I hope I don't sound ignorant. But I for as long as I could remember I have had positive or negative feelings toward letters and numbers. I recently shared this with a few of my hall mates, and I was surprised that they found it odd. I mentioned how I don't like to write my name because it has a lower case r in it and a capital D. I mentioned how numbers with only 1, 3, 4, and 7 give me a good vibe, but 2, 6, 9,and 5 are awful while the rest are neutral. I can divide the alphabet similarly.
Sounds like a minor type of synesthesia to me. Synesthesia isn’t an illness or a symptom, it’s just a syndrome prevalent in people with high IQs and intellectual tendencies. Many synesthetes enjoyed spending time alone as a kid, have questioned the bases of reality at some point, and read proficiently. Not to say we are whacked out stoner types though. Synesthetes tend to have an advantage in memory stability and logical processing, although we are historically at a disadvantage in the developmental mental health department (did you experience any serious depression as a pre-teen and young adult?).
Admittedly synesthesia is something that’s so much easier to live with after you know you have it. When I was five years old, there was a tape of Irish folk music my parents used to play. It made me think of things and see things that I knew nothing about, and I told my parents “it made me feel funny”. When they offered to get rid of it I got upset and took it to my room so they wouldn’t find it… and it’s been like that for my whole life. When I was younger I considered the possibility of being either “multiple personality” or perhaps housing other consciousnesses than mine in my own brain. Different bands/songs/albums give me the most vivid images and entire “memories” of places I’ve never been or seen or experienced. It was so confusing as a teenager. Before I was “into Coheed” (putting it lightly) I was a fucking wreck because I was compelled to be certain things and do certain things by what I thought were different people inside me. But it was simply synesthetic experience. I’d say I wish I knew about synesthesia earlier, because knowing I had it would have saved me a lot of misery, but without that misery I might not be where I am today… which I wouldn’t trade the world for.
Sorry for the essay, but I’ll go on a bit about other parts of my synesthesia. I like the numbers 1, 3, and 7. 4 and 6 make me feel uncomfortable and trapped. 5 and 9 are positive-neutral. 8 makes me nervous. All multiples of 10 are acceptable. 2 is okay because it’s prime. Double-evens (42, 68, 84 etc) are not okay unless they are a multiple of 11 (22, 44 etc). I can also sort the alphabet in a similar manner - A, C, G, K, L, N and V are very good while B, H, M, J, and P are weirdly offensive. And yes, it’s inherent.
Everyone is going to think I’m crazy, but welcome to my brain.
There are a lot of things Tumblr loves that I couldn’t care less about, and right now The Hunger Games is first and foremost on that list. Seriously, if I see one more mockingjay logo I’m going to set something on fire. I was impressed that you all avoided the Twilight craze, but this is almost as bad. There is nothing special, original, or even interesting about The Hunger Games and for the first time in my life I hope the movie was better than the book.
There are two good things I can say about The Hunger Games. First: I appreciate that Katniss is a strong female character, even though she never developed past “Level 1 Strong Female Character”. Second: I’m glad that a generation of young readers has been introduced to a genre of Orwellian post-End existential fiction. That being said, here’s my problem.
1. The prose. Maybe my biggest issue with the series is that the writing style plods along like a lobotomized mule. It’s juvenile and irritatingly simple. Sometimes simplicity is good (see: Cormac McCarthy’s “The Road”) but through this whole series I felt like Suzanne Collins was talking to me the way you’d read to third graders. It seemed condescending and I had an irrational desire to slap her. Reading a good book is supposed to soar and carry you along effortlessly, and I felt the polar opposite here. Bad prose ruins story potential.
2. The plot. Peasant children fight to the death for the amusement of super rich people. This series was billed as edgy and thought-provoking, but it’s your basic sub-par, unimaginative dystopian fantasy. Some kids dying doesn’t make a story “edgy” and a vague analogy on class warfare doesn’t make it “thought-provoking”. This fucking love story turns it into Twilight for the post-apocalypse. And like an entire contingent of the Internet is currently screaming: It’s unoriginal. Aside from the obvious Battle Royale comparison, here are two much better Orwellian-dystopia books that I do recommend reading.
"The Last Book in the Universe" by Rodman Philbrick: The story is set in a post-disaster future city, called The Urb, which has been disturbed by an earthquake known as “The Big Shake”. Genetically improved people, called “proovs,” live in the rich guarded center called Eden, with a beautiful intellectual society, abundant food and clean water.
"The Long Walk" by Stephen King (as Richard Bachman): The plot revolves around the contestants of a grueling walking contest, held annually by a somewhat despotic and totalitarian version of the United States of America. One hundred teenage boys participate in an annual walking contest called “The Long Walk,” which is the “national sport”. Each Walker must maintain a speed of at least four miles per hour. There are no stops, rest periods, or established finish line, and the Walk does not pause for any reason (including bad weather or darkness); it ends only when one Walker is left alive.
I will preface this by saying that my most memorable Coheed moment is somewhat cheesy, but they mean the world to me and I would never trade the experience. In high school, I was severely depressed and music was one of the few things I thought I had left in this world. My soundtrack at the time was pretty much Good Apollo 1. So, long story short, that album saved my life, and though it was a tempestuous time for the band, that album has a special place in my heart.
I think a lot of people (including me) can seriously relate to that. Music is what gives a destination back to an existence that’s lost meaning, and I’ve heard a version of your story from probably hundreds of different people. It’s truly amazing.
My favorite memory was when I went to see them on their SSTB tour. The whole concert blew my mind but no words can explain the excitement I felt when they played No World for Tomorrow. The way Claudio would make the crowd go crazy every time he sang the chorus, we all put our fists in the air sang it with so much passion it was amazing. I will never forget that and I really hope that I get to see them again soon. I don't think I will ever love another band as much as I love Coheed.<3
It's a little depressing, but my favorite part is when it finally comes down to saying our goodbyes. Especially when we all said goodbye after the House of Blues show in Chicago. I'd kill for one of those magnificent hugs from anyone that night. I love the fact that we said goodbye multiple times only to find out minutes later we had parked in the same parking garage and we even parked on the same level. I've never felt so much love from a group of Coheed fans before, new and old Heedtrip buds.
Even though I kind of leak tears about them for a few days afterwards, the goodbyes are really special. Even when they drag out so long that it gets harder to leave with every passing second.
Is it just me or do those goodbyes feel like the LOTR end scene where Frodo leaves for the Grey Havens?
Favorite moment was definitely when I stood in a crowd of 200 people, finally seeing them live in my own country, Argentina, after 8 years of being a fan, and honestly thinking they would never ever come. It was surreal, I screamed and cried and sang and jumped, it was so intense and perfect. Man, I'll never get over that concert, or this band.
No, you won’t! Haha. I don’t think anyone ever does. I hope to see you travel one day - you are always welcome in my country where you can follow a tour instead of a single show! <3
My favorite Coheed memory has to be listening to SSTB while driving home from campus late at night. Listening to Delerium Trigger driving with the windows down, down desolate highways is a feeling you've got to, well, feel to understand. I still get chills everything I hear the beginning of Delerium Trigger.
I do know the feeling! Many a road has been traveled to the tune of SSTB <3 Appreciate this submission, because it’s nice to know that it’s not my imagination.
“… Anyone who wants to know the human psyche will learn next to nothing from experimental psychology. He would be better advised to abandon exact science, put away his scholar’s gown, bid farewell to his study, and wander with human heart through the world. There, in the horrors of prisons, lunatic asylums and hospitals, in drab suburban pubs, in brothels and gambling-hells, in the salons of the elegant, the Stock Exchanges, socialist meetings, churches, revivalist gatherings and ecstatic sects, through love and hate, through the experience of passion in every form in his own body, he would reap richer stores of knowledge than text-books a foot thick could give him, and he will know how to doctor the sick with a real knowledge of the human soul… .”—Carl Gustav Jung. The Psychology of the Unconscious. (via seeyoulateraggregator)
My favorite Coheed moment came on night 2 of Neverender NYC. The Light & The Glass has always been my favorite Coheed song and though I'd seen them many times before I'd never gotten to hear it live. The pit was so alive that night and the energy was crazy intense, but when all of Terminal 5 was chanting "pray for us all" I could do nothing but tear up. I've never felt closer to Heaven. I now have TLATG lyrics tattooed on me with its dragonfly buddy! COTF are the best!
Beautiful! Sadly, I did not make it to Neverender but I am happy you got to experience it. :)
1 of my fave coheed memories was back in i think 8th grade, i bought a ticket to see them on a school night & sadly wasn't allowed to go. i cried a shit ton that night, but then figured there was no sense in moping, & i ended up dancing & rocking out to iksose3 for the rest of the night in my room, trying to emulate the feeling i got from seeing them live (not an easy task). it's kind of corny, but the music makes me SO HAPPY it didn't matter if it was live or not at that point. <3
That is inspiring! I hope you got to go to a show later along the road though. It would kill me to miss one. :(
My favorite thing about Coheed is 'HeedTripping. I love seeing everybody together, all at once. I love waiting in line for hours, I love hauling ass 300 miles to sit in line for 4 hours to see a 3 song set. And I love that I get to see you nearly every time ;) Without you I would have never been opened up to the amazing world that is 'HeedTripping. So thank you! <3
Oh man I love all of those things so much! I love janky bus stations and Baller Pads and tour stank! And the weather’s getting nice - this is ‘Heedtrippin season! Someone get me out of here and on the road behind their tour bus immediately!
Also, I’d never have been opened up to the world of ‘Heedtripping without YOU. You were the most gracious of hosts ;) the first time I went to Chicago. So thank you! It’s truly unbelievable how much our lives have changed in every way.
I love so much about Coheed. But my favorite personal moment was in Sayreville on the SSTB tour. It was my second time seeing Coheed. I first time I saw them was with friends in my hometown of Tulsa, OK. Seeing them on my own, so far from where I came from was, for whatever reason, really powerful for me. I cried through all of the acoustic Tower, NM. The whole show was so beautiful, and I have loved that song for so long. Coheed also got me into the world of graphic novels :)
I still wish we had known each other then because we could have been a weepy mess together during Elf Tower. Claudio sings it with such emotion like the time that inspired it was yesterday. It kills me. And the instrumentation they used live was so beautiful!
I wish a glorious abundance of Coheed shows for your future. :)
My favorite thing is the fans. We really are like one big family and thats apparent at any heed show you attend. That and everyone who has ever been in Coheed is just as dedicated to the fans as we are to them. I have yet to hear a story from a fan saying a member of the band was rude to them .... and I've heard a lot of stories in my journeys across the fence. The energy in all of us is something you don't find often among fandom
Another great answer! Every band says that their fans are “a breed apart” but with Coheed fans I feel it is literally true. Like there is something in our blood that draws us to certain things. We feel the same emotions and share so many similarities in the stories we tell. When I was younger, one of the only things that could get me through a day was listening to Coheed and knowing that somewhere in the world, someone was feeling the same weird elation that I was feeling. The idea still gives me a shiver.
The intricacy and complexity of both Claudio's storyline and the music itself are what really make Coheed for me. On top of that the emotion present in both the comics and the music (the lyrics, the singing and screaming, and the instrumentation). Oh and The Second Stage Turbine Blade, just all of it. I teared up a bit when I got SSTB: Ultimate Edition.
Your answer is very much like the reasons I got into Coheed in the first place. The things that Claudio finds to be conceptually critical - love, redemption, loyalty, hope - are things that resonate most strongly with me. Back when I got into Coheed I remember being so grateful and relieved that something like this existed, something that could remind me how to understand and feel the things that were most important.
This is another anon from the one who already said that they admire you. I admire you also, especially after that list of flaws that you posted. You seem to be a strong and confident woman who works for what she wants, and that impresses me greatly. I love that you accept those "flaws" about yourself. From that list, you remind me of me, but so much better, because you have been able to accept that. <3
Aw. :) I am confident because I have to believe that my good qualities will always outweigh the unpleasant things about me. And they do. One truly good thing has infinite power and can counteract endless negativity. I do believe this because otherwise I would be useless in looking after the things I love. I hope you decide to fully love and accept yourself one day soon. Surely you deserve it.
Pearl of the Stars is my favorite song, I think. It never fails to bring tears, especially after reading Year of the Black Rainbow. I also saw them for the first and only (so far) time last spring and they won my heart.
The layers of emotion and subtlety in that album/book are just amazing!
I'm so jealous of you. You're an excellent writer and express yourself so well, you're so so smart and to top it off, gorgeous and healthy. I feel like you have no flaws and there is nothing you could do wrong. I admire you so much! (I would say this to your face of course, just scared you'd think I'm a freak)
This makes me kind of sad because life is too short to spend time comparing yourself to unrealistic conceptions of someone else. Since you said these things I assume you haven’t met me in person. If it makes you feel any better, here are some flaws and some things that I am not good at:
- Being nice. I’m bad at pleasantries and social courtesies and get progressively ruder when I’m forced to make them. I’m blunt and prickly and the average person avoids me.
- Empathy. I don’t have a lot of pity for people who mess up other people’s lives with their problems. I often discredit feelings as stupid. I’m selfish.
- Relationships. My priority is business and nothing gets in the way. So if I have a relationship with someone, either you mesh well with the business or you’re really fucking special. I haven’t hung out with anyone in months. I have maybe two friends in real life and I haven’t had a boyfriend or girlfriend in years.
- Expressing myself. I look good “on paper” and I write okay but I’m not eloquent in real life. I have a lisp and I can’t pronounce my R’s.
- Crooked teeth, duck-footed, pear-shaped woman with no grace. That’s me. None of these things lower my opinion of myself but how I present myself online is like what they do to models in magazines. It’s realistic enough to be recognizable but you can bet they edited out the purple pouches under her eyes.
Look, I’m not complaining about myself to get attention or have it refuted. All these things are real and an accepted part of me. I don’t want anyone having an unrealistic image. We all put our best foot forward online, and I do it so I can be more effective in all manner of things.
Just saying anon, that if you have a bright smile or care about others or have feelings or can say “Good morning!” and mean it, maybe I am jealous of you. If you say who you are I won’t think you’re a freak, but you certainly don’t have to if you’re uncomfortable.