The Official “Hey Internet, I’ve Lost Weight” Post
This is the post I’ve been putting off for awhile because I’m a perfectionist. No matter how big of an improvement I make in my life, I feel that I can do more and better. So please bear with me as I attempt to take this next step into health.
Since last May, I’ve lost 65 pounds (somewhere between 60 and 70, anyways; I’m not sure how much I weighed at the beginning). I met many of you for the first time on Coheed’s Neverender: SSTB tour during the six shows somewhere between New Jersey and Chicago. If you met me then, the image you have of me is the me on the left (taken at Starland), at probably around 250 pounds. That tour was excruciatingly hard on my health, and I decided then that I could do better for myself. Since then I have taken to exercising frequently and eating a nearly perfect regular diet.
This morning, I weighed in at 180, and the photo on the right (which was actually taken for an alt-plus-size blog) is very recent. I still have about 40 pounds to go, and I’ve debated long about even posting this. Even the most logical person is very prone to body dysmorphia and skewed perceptions - I know I look okay right now and I’m in the best health of my adult life, but I’m at that awkward stage where I can’t decide whether I’m “fat” or not. But I wanted to share this weird, personal shit with you as the year ends and we begin anew in 2012.
To be honest, I took on the task of physical health for the only reason that is able to motivate so many of us - the Coheed universe. At the beginning of 2011 I was given the task of operating the Coheed street team Kids of the Fence. Later I was made a moderator and then administrator on the fansite Cobalt and Calcium. Many other perks and responsibilities followed this official entrance into the Coheed clockwork. These responsibilities (which actually felt more like privileges after eight years of doing the work regardless) made me too crucially aware of myself and my position in a machine I cared about more than anything. How could I be trusted to operate these facets of the Coheed realm when I couldn’t be trusted to take care of myself? How could I utilize a keen intellect as the weapon I claimed it to be, when the pitiable state of my physical body was contradictory to everything I believed in? And what kind of positive influence could I hope to be, if I wasn’t a healthy and well-rounded individual?
Fast forward, and here I am. I am in excellent health for my size. I am quicker, stronger, more muscular, more coordinated. I love myself, I feel good, and I think I look pretty okay. From this point forward, I am going to be a little more open about the process because I’ve finally reached a point where I’m not ashamed of the way I treat myself. Obviously I’ll be continuing my regularly-scheduled posting about Coheed and comics and other stuff you follow me for, but if you see some little motivational posts sneak in there, don’t be surprised. I’ve also learned more about human biology and physiology than I ever thought I’d need, because health and science go hand in hand. I know enough to pass a personal trainer book test (although not the physical test) so if you want tips or advice, feel free to ask.
I’m posting this in hopes of encouraging you to always strive to make yourself better. Be aware that “better” does not, I repeat NOT, mean “thinner” or “prettier”. “Better” can mean just about anything, from an improvement to your state of health to a push for a positive mental attitude. There is nothing more bad-ass than positivity and a healthy life. You want to lose weight? Do it. You want to recover? Do it. You want to be happy? Do it. You want to live fearlessly? Fucking do it. Get moving. This goes out to all of you, every single one - no matter who you are, or where you are, despite your past and despite your limitations. It’s never too late.
A new day’s marching through the door.
Questions, comments, and feedback go here. Please specify if you want a question answered privately. I am completely willing to offer advice and I will not share your personal thoughts. If you don’t have a Tumblr you can submit anonymously, but all anon questions will be answered publicly unless you provide a way to get in contact. Thank you!
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